JRE Episode # 1336 - Legion of Skanks

JRE Episode #1336 – Legion of Skanks

Published: 08/19/2019

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Show Notes:

They start off talking about how high they all are off ‘that Mike Tyson Weed’. One of the ‘skanks’ says that Tyson smokes 40k worth of weed a month. According to the article they read Eben Briton says they smoke 10 tons of weed a month. The guys marvel about how much weed that is and Jamie pulls up a chart that someone had created explaining just how much 40k worth of weed is. It boils down to about 4 blunts an hour.

They talk about Mike Tyson and his career and how he has changed so much from the beginning. Joe asks if they medicated him because he went from this huge guy who was always angry to a very nice, laid back, cool guy. They said when he was 13 he weighed 190 lbs, and they would put him in the ring with 16 year olds. He is the reason why now if you’re on tv for even 5 minutes they start stressing about your tattoos asking if you can cover them, or get a release for them all, because the artist who did his face tattoo sued for millions of dollars because they used his artwork without his permission.

They talk about their tattoos and Luis and Jay have matching tattoos that have Dave’s name in them. Luis asks Jay if he has ever gotten a tattoo for a girl. He says yes. They laugh about terrible tattoos they and their friends have gotten. Dave stays quiet through this part because he doesn’t have any tattoos. Jay says he is always amazed by people who are really good at doing tattoos. Steve Butcher is one tattoo artist who is incredible. His tattoos look like high definition photographs.

The topic transitions to fitness. Luis says he used to get hemorrhoids from working out because he would strain too hard. They talk about Ari Shaffir who has horrible hemorrhoids and his anus bleeds regularly. He is getting surgery to fix it. Joe says its a ‘real pain in the ass to get that surgery’. They admire his ability to find beautiful women. Joe had a ‘fitness competition’ with Ari and he did amazingly for someone who wasn’t ‘in shape’ at the beginning of it. Joe says he watched the bathhouse scene from John Wick on loop during the fitness competition to help him stay energized. They talk about different weight loss methods including ‘intermittent fasting’ Jay brings up Joe’s high meat diet and asks if he has ever gotten Gout. Joe doesn’t even know what causes it.

They discuss rules on flights, and crazy experiences. Joe tells the story of two guys who started fighting about overhead storage space during a flight he was on. They question when an air marshal would actually step in on a fight. They mention a few other videos they’ve seen of crazy people on planes.

Someone brings up Starbucks and their new policy where anyone who walks into the building is considered a customer. This all started because two guys had gone into the Starbucks, sat down, and were asked to leave. They caused such a huge issue over the situation that the cops were called and they had to physically remove the guys from the building. More homeless people are showing up at Starbucks now and Joe wonders if the influx of homeless people effects the business. Joe calls upon the other three guys to try and solve the homeless problem. They used to institutionalize the homeless. Jay suggests just hunting them at night like the Nutria rat.

They talk about how many homeless people there are in certain areas. Jay brings up young people who are ‘homeless’ but are really ‘just a phone call away’ from not being homeless anymore. There are wifi/charging stations in New York, that now are just surrounded by homeless people. Joe asks about burner phones, and cheap android phones. Luis says he has MetroPCS and he loves it. He says he has no reason to switch other than the fact his friends make fun of him.

They talk about wanting brand names is somewhat ridiculous because there isn’t much difference between the ‘knock off’ and the high end items. But as kids they wanted the best brand names out there because other kids would make fun of them if they didn’t have the name brand. Luis talks about the brands he loved as a kid. They all list off different brands of shoes and say whether or not they like them.

The comedy show “Would You Bang Him” is brought up. They have female comedians sit and watch someone do a comedy set and they have to decide if they wold have sex with him. Ari Shaffir does his set, and he just gets naked, and chases the women around the stage and tries to hit them with his dick. This was agreed to prior to the show. They said people really didn’t enjoy having Louis CK on the show and that companies are having issues with people writing angry letters and boycotting them because of Louis. Luis brings up an excellent point about the companies who ‘stay woke’ and play to the people who write those angry letters. ‘If you buy into that, you’re just a mark to them.’ They talk about the Equinox Gym/brand and that people are boycotting them because one of the owners is a huge trump supporter and he had a fundraiser recently to support trump. Luis says that people who boycott them and have issues aren’t even members of the gym.

Joe says that if you support anything that has to do with trump then you’re considered a racist. Luis takes it further and says that no one will defend you either because they will be seen as a racist, and no one wants to be seen as that. Jay says no one even knows the definition of being a nazi or racist. They elaborate on the idea that no one can be moderate. Everyone has to be one or the other and you can’t support one tiny aspect of Trump without also supporting racism and bigotry. One of them brings up McCarthyism and the Red Scare and a kins it to that. . Dave says you have those people who are scared of someone ‘defecting’ and then there’s the opportunists who see that fear and play into it making it worse. Jay wants to know why it has to be so defined.

Joe asks the guys if anyone stands out as a possible candidate. Dave supports Tulsi Gabbard, even if he disagrees with 80% of her stances because she is dead on about the war and medicare. She has done 2 tours in Iraq and is still active duty. Jay says he always wondered what female cops are doing in a hostile situation besides getting the perp get much more hurt or tasered. He got a lot of heat for that statement. Luis says it doesn’t even have to be a female. You just can’t have a 110 lb person going and dealing with a hostile situation. Joe talks about a female cop who was beaten down by a guy at a routine traffic stop. They go into women cops being more in the way, Joe says theres a lot of men who would be in the way as well. He believes that a small person by themselves as cop is in trouble. And that he would never want to be a cop because of the danger that goes along with it. He says that cops deal with PTSD every day and it is not even recognized.

Joe tells a story about doing security for a concert at 19 and there was very much a ‘us v them’ mentality. ‘It’s such a simple job, but there’s the us v them with the pot and liquor that led to this huge rift between the security officers and the concert goers.’ Cell phones have become the great equalizer because people are recording the police everywhere they go. Dave brings up the video of people throwing water and buckets at cops and they just don’t do shit because they are being recorded. But back before cell phones they would have been all over those people.

Joe brings up “The Seven Five” and says that Michael Dowd is a really nice guy and super open about what was happening in the documentary. He says he is remorseful because he was out of control doing coke every day as a cop. They all talk about how easy it was for people to become bad cops. Luis believes that there isn’t really a moral issue with police taking a little bit of the drug money they get during busts. If they were to find 50k and only reported 40k and brought the other 10k home to their wife and kids, that’s okay. If they get caught they get arrested for committing a crime but its not that big of a deal. The other guys think that it’s hypocritical for the cops to arrest someone during a drug bust and to turn around and steal the money.

They discuss just legalizing drugs all together, but the room is divided. Joe asks if people would do more drugs once they were legal. Dave thinks definitely, there’s so many different forms of weed now, it’s in candy, drinks, vapor, its cheaper and there’s more variety. Luis smokes his vape everywhere he goes, he doesn’t have any issues.

Snoop did commentary on a wrestling match and it was so funny they actually had him doing commentary on all sorts of sports for a while. The title of the show was called SnoopCast.

This gets the group talking about MMA fights, and Colby Covington. They talk about how he is intentionally trying to get people in a huff to generate interest in the sport. Chael did a similar thing as well, he used to not be such ‘a big mouth’ but now he is. Luis calls both of them smart. Colby is contrived, which makes it obvious he is putting on a show. But he is still messing with people’s heads and he is really good at what he does. They say that if youre a fan of MMA you have to be able to appreciate what he is doing. They all have respect for Colby and his abilities. Luis says the whole 170 division is looking crazy right now. They talk about Nate Diaz. He got the loudest cheering from the crowd the other night when he walked out. They say he is incredible and won two fights he did that night. Dave brings up Nate v Connor and how good of a fight it was.

The topic goes back to smoking weed and CBD. Luis wonders if there is any CBD in the hemp plant itself and how much there is. Joe says the hemp plant is amazing versatile. He says the stem of the plant being hard as oak but light as balsa wood. Joe explains the difference between hemp and weed. Hemp is not psychoactive. He goes a little into the history of the Hemp plant and the processes that went along with making it into different textiles and products. They used to have to beat the fibers down and because the fibers were so tough it was a lot of hard work and they would mainly use slave labor, until the 1 the ‘decorticator’ was introduced and that’s when people started going crazy with the ‘reefer madness’ movement.

Joe gets a call from his good friend Stipe Miocic which brings the guys back to UFC. They discuss about his recent loss. He apparently is having a rematch. Most successful heavyweight ever. The guys are frustrated by the fact that certain fights are only lined up to get more Pay-Per-View purchases and not because one guy actually deserves it.

Joe brings up a fighter by the name of Cowboy and how he wanted to get out of the game but he just went half in half out and he got beaten hard. UFC and MMA are not sports you can just dabble in you have to be all in.

The topic jumps to comedy and how it takes several years before you know if you’re even good enough to do comedy professionally. People will start in their 20’s and by the time they’re in their 30’s if they’re not able to make the cut, they don’t have anything to fall back on because they had spent the last 10 years working on just their comedy career. Joe brings up Charlie Murphy who did the comedy/fame thing ‘backwards’ he was famous first, and then decided to give comedy a shot. He was doing sold out shows while he was practicing. He started off doing comedy with the Chappelle show. They bring up Drew Michael doing a ‘no audience’ comedy show. Joe thinks that would be insanely weird. Jay says that you need an audience because they provide the energy that goes along with the show. It requires the interaction from the crowd.

They start discussing the difference between Android and iPhone. Joe says that the new Galaxy’s are amazing. Luis asks if there is a third option that is still an awesome phone. Jamie mentions Blackberry and that Tom Segura has one. Luis doesn’t like the Neuralink by Elon Musk because now you can put your phone down and ignore all the BS going on, but we are going to get to a point where you there is not phone down and you’ll never be able to ignore the BS going on! This brings Jay to self driving cars and how there’s been a few accidents. Joe explains how his Tesla requires a mild amount of involvement to operate. There are sensors in the steering wheel that have to be triggered in order for the car to work. They sell a phone holder that holds onto the steering wheel of your self driving car and it makes the sensors think you’re holding the wheel.

They make a joke about cars becoming so advanced they’ll even suck your dick. Joe says ‘they’ll probably just give you the experience in a chip but they won’t actually suck your dick’

They talk about the old ‘futuristic’ movies and say that iPhone models their phones and products after the slick metallic look that they had in those movies. Luis talks about the packaging of the iPhone and how amazing it is. Joe says the new keyboards are absolutely terrible. They’re not comfortable for typing on because you can’t feel the sensation of the keys moving. He says he has a 2015 macbook that he has refurbished because he hates the new keyboard just as much. Luis says that Joe just needs to get used to the keyboard. Luis asks how often you clean your keyboards and says he feels bad for his son every time he touches his computer.

They start talking about how nasty the subway handrails are. Luis says he doesn’t know how many times he has touched a handrail and found a human booger on his hand. They start talking about children. Joe wonders how old is too old for thumb sucking. They all talk about their kids for a bit. Joe brings up a hypothetical situation of a baby shooting a gun. He says he’d have an absolute blast as a baby with a gun. They start talking about gay men who shoot and that theres not alot of them out there. They create a hypothetical gay couple that lives in the woods. “All they do is chop wood an butt fuck” Joe

Bagel Boss Guy (aka Chris Morgan) said he doesnt have a problem with gay people as long as they dont touch him in the private area. They talk about him a little bit. Joe asks if they think he will be a long term thing like Joe the Plumber. Luis says Lenny Dykstra is fighting Bagel Boss Guy on celebrity boxing. They don’t think there is going to be a good competition and that lenny is going to kill Bagel Boss. Jay says there’s no integrity in celebrity boxing either way. Because they will put someone with actual skills against someone who cant fight.

Joe goes into headgear and he believes it doesn’t offer the protection you need. Luis says he hates headgear and he ended up having to take it off. This brings them to Football and they say that the helmets and shoulder pads do help keep them safe, Joe doesn’t think that the players would play that hard if they didn’t have that protection. Luis vouches for MMA being less dangerous than football. Fighters concussion rate, football concussion rate. Fighters get concussed once a year? Sub-concussive trauma/ CTE – Soccer players are getting it.

Jay brings up the argument that MMA is safer than Boxing. They will stop a MMA fight before they’ll stop a boxing match. They talk about how funny the rules are for boxing because you can’t really defend yourself unless you’re also fighting. They say it’s a weird time for fighting because there’s so many people who are heavily skilled. Luis thinks that MMA is the closest thing we have to competitive fighting. They discuss different fighting techniques, and then start talking about kids fighting. Luis doesn’t think they talk about that enough. That children are getting hit by the people who are supposed to be protecting them and it fucks them up’ psychologically. They talk about a female fighter named Cyborg and her accomplishments.

Luis brings up how in school they used to make each other pass out easily and they would do it all the time. They all believe there has to be some sort of effect on the brain from going unconscious over and over again. They talk about getting knocked out in fights. And bring up a few fighters who have been knocked out HARD. Where they weren’t able to remember what happened.

The group spends the last few minutes talking about different fighters, including Stipe, and Daniel Comorea and their techniques. The topic glazes over concussions, knockouts, body shots, liver punches and upcoming fights.

Find Big Jay Oakerson:

http://www.bigjaycomedy.com

https://www.instagram.com/bigjayoakerson/?hl=en

Find Luis J. Gomez:

https://www.instagram.com/gomezcomedy/?hl=en

Find Dave Smith:

http://comicdavesmith.com

Quotes:

I will never question Mike Tyson again.
– Big Jay Oakerson

Girls wanna get married. Guys are like I’m gonna get a tattoo of your name on me bro
– Joe Rogan

If you said to me ‘what’s the one thing you can’t draw?’ I’d say black people sweat.
– Big Jay Oakerson

There’s so many things that even if they’re great, it’s embarrassing.
– Joe Rogan

If you had converse sneakers you looked like a jerkoff
– Big Jay Oakerson

There’s a lot of good people who have a lot of money, and they do a lot of really good shit.
– Luis J. Gomez

The fucked up part is that you only have two choices when voting.
– Joe Rogan

Human beings don’t do well with authority mixed with impunity.
– Dave Smith

As soon as that battery runs out on that cell phone, I’m shooting you in the stomach!
Big Jay Oakerson

I have almost no problem with cops skimming off the top of drug money.
– Luis J. Gomez

One of the ugly things about being a human is people want drugs.
– Joe Rogan

You know what heroin is? It’s like taking a bath in a pool full of kittens.
– Luis J. Gomez

It’s hard watching a friend that you really love, getting his ass kicked.
– Joe Rogan

I root against fisting, actually
– Luis J. Gomez

If there’s something that divides this country more than ‘right and left’ its Android vs iPhone.
– Joe Rogan

If you don’t have an iPhone you’re a fucking loser!
– Luis J. Gomez

All they do is chop wood and butt fuck.
– Joe Rogan

Call me a Bitch, I tap quick! Who knows what that going unconscious thing is doing, you’re going to the Netherlands, you might come back a totally different person with a totally different life.
– Joe Rogan